What if I actually ran away? Who would have something to say?
Even if they did I could not hear, by that time I could be in South Korea
People need to address their issues, instead of using all the tissues
We all have stuff going on, so stop dragging me along
to your hateful world of excuses and lies, I have tried to help lord knows I’ve tried
Entitlement is the topic of discussion, me again, the emotional cushion
Why do I allow myself to be so loyal? When my dreams and plans they want to foil?
Loved ones lie and bury heads, whilst I speak the truth until I’m dead
Their actions will be the death of me, I’m almost there just look and see
Working from morning until the night, working the weekend and missing light
Juggling commitments and a home, I’m being ground to the bone
When was the last time I did something for me? Made myself fill up with glee?
In all honesty I can’t remember, my mind lives in that dark December
That month I thought my life was great, until a cloud descended with my fate
It transpired that I was blind and loyalty exists only in the mind
No matter what ‘good’ people do, they will find the time to puncture you
in one ear and the other, this is why I can’t become a mother
Unconditional love is a thing of beauty but it is also a dangerous thing of duty
Mothers, fathers, daughter and son, I did not ask for anyone
so why do I exist in this draining place, full of anger and distaste?
They do not need me and my opinion, yet they need me and my opinion
They do not think I am one of power, yet they call me in their low hour
They do not think I can think or speak, yet it’s me they call when they meet defeat
They do not think that I know, yet I always know just on the low
I don’t see faces I see souls and I can see that they’re not whole
I don’t see their anger or their rage, I see someone lost, trapped in a cage
I don’t see their judgement or their reason, but often I can see their treason
I don’t see them haughty or their higher level, I just see a mind that is disheveled
I can’t help but wonder what would be, if I let myself be true and free
what would become of these traitors? These secret self loathing haters?
Would they wonder where I ran? Would they find me and do all they can?
Hell to the N to the inevitable O, this life is just a one man show
rest assured when I eventually break, I will be the one to seal my fate
and I can guarantee you won’t be there, involving yourself in my affairs
I become that girl you knew, the one with rage who was always true
so universe please answer this…can you fulfill my only wish?
Make me a resentful runaway and in one place I will never stay.