Love Lonelines

Enjoying your own company is an important activity you should participate in often. Nothing is as spiritual or as wondrous as the depth of our own minds. We can transport ourselves to any dimension containing anything and anyone. It is in this fantasy world we can be free without fear of judgement, responsibility or obligation.

Some people will likely only experience this feeling right before they drop off to sleep…or maybe not at all if their minds are too full of their worries from the real world. If you are used to being around people constantly you may find yourself a bit lost when no one is around. Use these moments to find your individuality. We often have new experiences with other people, which creates an immediate association with the two. If you went to view a piece of art alone you would likely take more time to consider its creation, the who, what, why and when and bring forth a certain emotion towards it. If you visited it with another person or group then your perception could easily be clouded or your experience cut short, resulting in a lost opportunity for personal growth.


The more frequently you take time to be alone the more you connect with your inner self. Your intuitive side will become stronger and you will start to govern your life using your gut instinct. Opinions from people, positive and negative, can drown your inner voice. Taking a couple of hours every few days to centre yourself will freshen your mind and spirit so you can let your individuality shine. If you struggle to do this, start by writing down your immediate thoughts to empty your mind. Then let your mind wander further than your immediate surroundings and situations. Reading is an excellent way to train your mind to transport you to another world.  I do not mean the daily newspaper, gossip column or car magazine. Those kinds of reading materials will turn your mind to mush. Try fiction and history books instead…seriously. Allowing yourself this personal time to develop your creative self will help you contribute uniquely when you are with other people. You will also be less likely to be a yes person, a pushover, a sidekick or a servant.


It is often said we find ourselves in times of struggle but why can we not find ourselves in times of stability too? It is a waste of the human mind to only participate in the material aspects of life. No matter what you believe in it cannot be denied that we all have an individual self that cannot be replicated by another. For each of us, this is our greatest power, as no one can perceive things in exactly the same way. Why spend that time watching soaps, eating crap and cleaning when you could be unlocking a side of yourself you never knew about?! It is easier said than done if you are stuck in a rut. Life can become about the 9-5 only, or who is cooking, who is washing up and how will that bill be paid this month. It is rather trivial in the grand scheme of things though do you not agree?



Another way to be useful to yourself in times of loneliness is to reflect on the interactions you have recently had with people. Not in an anxious, self-conscious way but in a positive ‘how can I handle that better next time?’ way. Half the battle with any relationship is trying to imagine how the other person feels and why. There is always a reason people are the way they are and having little reflection sessions with yourself will allow you to unlock their brains. Careful though…with great power comes great responsibility!


Once your confidence has grown and you are in the habit of enjoying your company, it is time to venture out on solo trips. You should have had some creativity flowing, some great realisations about what you really like/want in life and which relationships are worth nurturing. If you did not then…try harder…it is totally worth it I promise! Once you have mastered being alone you will crave it more so you can put plans into action. Remember to remain in balance though, do not become too reclusive. I have heard that humans actually make good company …sometimes.


Author: Defined by Thrine

'The times they are a-changin' A passionate writer without an agenda History undergraduate Speak freely, listen intently #moreyinthanyang #healthydebates Enjoy...Defined by Thrine.

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